


Just another day in the Seireitei

by CanadiangirllovesHP



Category: Bleach
Genre: Crack, Other, Out of Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2011-10-12
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-07-12 10:44:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7099633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CanadiangirllovesHP/pseuds/CanadiangirllovesHP
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Kurotsuchi needs some help testing a new soul candy. If only the other Captains knew what they were in for. Crack Fic. . Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Captain's Meeting

Just another day in the Seireitei

Chapter 1: The Captain’s meeting

Disclaimer: Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making any money from this story.

This is my first Bleach story and is a pure crack fic. No shinigami were hurt in the making of this story (the mental scars will heal eventually).

All was quiet in the Seireitei. It was just another day, just another captains meeting.

“… so if that is all the division report we will proceed with the new business”, stated Captain General Yamamoto. “Captain Kurotsuchi has a new development”.

“Yes. We have developed a new soul candy that needs testing. It enhances the senses and stamina in battle. Of course we are not at war now but I would still like to see if it makes a difference out of battle”, replied Captain Kurotsuchi. “We would like some of the captains to test it for us”.

“Captains Soifon, Byakuya Kuchiki, Shunsui Kyoraku, Toshiro Hitsugaya, Kenpachi Zaraki and Jushiro Ukitake will test the soul candy for the 12th Division”, Yamamoto ordered. The captains were handed the packages of soul candy. “Please take one tomorrow morning. Captain Kurotsuchi and his unit will observe you during the day to see the results. You are all dismissed.”

The captains chosen for the test stayed behind to talk.

“Why do we get to test this”, complained Kenpachi, “I have better things to do”.

“I happen to think it is an honor to serve the Gotei in any way”, huffed Soifon. “This could be very useful in defeating our enemies”.

“Hopefully 12th Division will not get in the way of us conducting our business”, Hitsugaya said.

“Well I’m not going to worry about it”, Kyoraku drawled. “My Nanao-chan will straighten out all problems it causes.”

“What do think Kuchiki”, questioned Ukitake.

Kuchiki stared at the others then stalked from the room.

“Stuck up prick”, muttered Zaraki.

“Now, now I’m sure he had important things to do”, Ukitake always the peace-maker said.

“Whatever. I’m out of here”, stated Zaraki as he stormed from the room.

“Well I guess we all have duties to attend to”, Kyoraku spoke jovially. “Are you ready Jushiro”?

The all went their separate ways, not knowing what the next day would bring.


	2. Hitsugaya

Chapter 2: Hitsugaya

Disclaimer: Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making any money from this story.

The next day…..

“Captain sorry I’m late”, said Lieutenant Rangiku Matsumoto as she rushed through the door. She stopped dead in her tracks as she looked at her captain. Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya, one of the most serious, hard working captain in the Sereitei was sitting not at his desk surrounded by paperwork as usual …she blinked and blinked again. He was sprawled on the couch, feet up on one of the arms, playing…she shook her head…a video game and OH MY GOD blowing bubbles with GUM!! He glanced over to her.

“Yo Rangiku babe, no problem” he drawled, “it’s s’all good”. He looked back to his DS. “Ha froze your ass bitch. Articuno rules!”

“Captain?” She slowing inched her way closer. “What are you doing?”

“Chilling…playing Pokemon. Take that…Aurora beam…cha-ching I win!”

“P-p-playing P-p-pokemon!” She crumpled to the floor. “What about your paperwork” she asked a hint of desperation in her voice.

 

“Fuck it!”

“---“

“---“

“Captain?”

He glanced at her popping a large bubble. “What’s this captain crap? You’ve known me long enough call me Toshiro.”

She gave a startled squeak her eyes growing wide.

“Why don’t you take the day off?” He dug in his pockets. “Here”, he handed her some money, “go get some sake, my treat”.

“Ahhhhhh!”

“What’s the matter?”

“A-are you feeling ok, captain?”

“Totally bitching, how bout you?”

“I-I’ll just go now” she slowing backed out of the room.

“Later babe.”

“Ahhh…” She ran screaming from the building not stopping until she reached the 4th Division barracks.


	3. Kyoraku

Chapter 3: Kyoraku

Disclaimer: Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making any money from this story.

Meanwhile in the 8th Division barracks…

“Where is that lazy, infuriating man hiding now” fumed Lieutenant Nanao Ise as she stalked into the 8th Division office. She stopped in the doorway, eyes wide in disbelief. There was her captain sitting behind his desk (did he even know he had a desk) doing PAPERWORK!”

“Ah hello Nanao it about time you got here” he said as he frantically wrote. “There are a lot of things to do today. Could you file that pile of finished reports for me please?”

“F-finished reports?” She glanced at the large pile he referred to. “Y-you finished ALL of these…by yourself?”

He dropped another paper on top of the pile. Grabbing a new sheet he began to write. “As soon as I finish the paperwork I need to inspect the division, lead a training session…oh did someone paint the barracks yet?”

“Huh?”

“Paint the barracks?”

“N-No.”

“Well I guess I’ll just have to do that later also.” He started shaking his pen. He smacked it on the desk. Smack, smack, “damn it! Piece of shit pen” he flung the pen against the wall and began digging through his desk drawers. “Where the hell is another pen?”

Nanao squeaked and hurried to her desk and grabbed another pen. “Here Captain.”

“Thanks. Why don’t I have more pens?”

Nanao stared at the captain. ’What the HECK is going on.’ “You normally do not need pens. You don’t usually do a lot of writing.”

“Nonsense. Paperwork is important. Don’t you think?” He went back to writing frantically. “I need more pens…and lunch. Bring me some lunch. I’m much too busy to stop for lunch.”

“S-sure thing.” She started to inch her way out off the room. “I’ll go get you a BIG BOX of pens and some lunch, okay” she said in a tone of voice reserved for scared children and rabid animals.

“Thanks” he said not even looking up from his work.

Nanao eased out of the room and hurried to the 4th Division. Her captain was obviously having a psychotic break down and needed help.


	4. Zaraki

Chapter 4: Zaraki

Disclaimer: Bleach is own by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making and money from this story.

The song ‘Weapon of Choice’ is by the genius Fatboy Slims (2003-Skint Records/ Astralwerks) with the music video directed by Spike Lee (featuring Christopher Walken).

This is one of my favorite chapters, hope you enjoy it.

Meanwhile at the 11th Division barracks……

Ikkaku Madarame, 3rd seat and Yumichika Ayasegawa, 5th seat were sparing while they waited for their captain to show up.

“That was NOT a very beautiful move” complained Yumichika as he dodged a swing from Ikkaku.

“Ha!”

They stopped their fight as they saw the captain entering the barracks.

“WHAT THE HELL” swore Ikkaku. Captain Kenpachi Zaraki, feared warrior captain of the 11th Division was wearing a frilly PINK APRON!!

“All right men we going to do something fun today” he said gleefully. “We’re baking COOKIES!”

“---“

“---“

“Doesn’t that sound fun?”

“---“

“---“

“Ah come on guys. Think nice yummy chocolate chip cookies” he happily exclaimed as he jumped up and down.

“Yeah cookies”, exclaimed Yachiru.

Ikkaku and Yumickika looked at each other then back at their captain.

“Captain are you feeling all right” asked Yumickika hesitantly.

“I’m feeling great! It’s a wonderful day in the neighborhood.* The birds are singing, the sun is shining and we get to bake cookies. Afterwards we can go play games with some children. We can play jacks and hopscotch. I love hopscotch. Come along guys” he turned and went in the direction of the kitchen.

Ikkaku and Yumickika slowly followed their captain, hands on their zanpakutos. They found him in the kitchen dropping ingredients into bowls, singing and dancing along to Fatboy Slims ‘Weapon of Choice’.

“… you can go with this, you can go that. You can go with this, you can go with that or can go with us…”** he stopped dancing. “Come on guys you can even lick the bowls when we’re done.” He twirled in time with the music flinging the flour that was in his hands all over Ikkaku and Yumickika.

They looked at each other, looked down at themselves covered with flour and ran screaming out of the room.

“What’s their problem” asked Kenpachi. ”Oh well” he resumed his baking (and singing and dancing) “…walk without rhythm and it won’t attract the worm. Walk without rhythm and it won’t attract the worm. If you walk without rhythm huh you never learn…”

“Yeah cookies” yelled Yachiru.

The men did not stop running until they reached the 4th Division. They did not notice the shadow on the building or the person who peeled himself out of that shadow.

“The test is going better than I thought, excellent.” He melted back into the side of the building.

* Sorry could not resist the ‘Mister Rogers’ reference.

** If you have not seen Fatboy Slims video for ‘Weapon of Choice’ go see it now. Then picture Kenpachi trying to do the dance moves…while baking…in a frilly pink apron…are you scarred for life yet?


	5. Soifon

Chapter 5: Soifon

Disclaimer: Bleach is owned by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making any money from this story.

Meanwhile at the 2nd Division…the stealth force was just finishing their training exercise.

“That was great guys. You looked good out there and very stealthy”, Soifon gushed. “You’re dismissed”. The men walked away very confused their captain’s comments. Soifon was checking out some of the men’s assets when Lieutenant Marechiyo Omaeda walked up. “Hi”.

“Hello Captain did the training finish already?”

“It was great!”

He looked at her in confusion.

“You look wonderful today. Have you lost some weight” she asked.

Omaeda’s eyes widen. “No Captain”.

“Well what ever it is you look great. I’m so luck to have you as my Lieutenant”.

He started to tremble. “Captain”, he said fearfully, “are you all right?”

“Of course I am. I’m just so pleased with the squad’s training, you must have been giving them pointers” she winked.

“---“

“You are a fine example for the rest of the squad. They follow your lead in the bravery and fighting skills”.

Omaeda started to shake. “Captain are you SURE you’re all right?”

“Why do you keep saying that? I’m so lucky to have you by my side and to be so concerned for me”. She glanced at the clock. “Oh I got to go; I wanted to go to the pet store to check out the puppies”.

“Puppies, Captain? I thought you only liked cats?”

“Cats are so over-rated”.

“---“

“Over-rated” he said with a moan. “But you love cats especially black cats”.

“I’m over cats”.

Omaeda’s knees started to buckle. “What…but…I…ahh”.

“See you later big boy” she patted him on the butt. She walked away giving him a wink.

Omaeda blinked. Blink. Blink. “Ahhhhhhhhh”. He ran screaming from the barracks towards the 4th Division.


	6. Ukitake

Chapter 6: Ukitake

Disclaimer: Bleach is own by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making and money from this story.  
Warning: Swearing

Meanwhile in the 13th Division…

Kiyone Kotetsu, co-3rd seat of the 13th Division was heading towards her captain’s quarters. ‘I hope he is feeling well today. I worry about him.’ She was almost there when she heard…

“Where in the FUCK is Kotetsu!”

‘That sounds like Captain Ukitake, but it can’t be him’ she thought as she hurried towards the door.

“Well it’s about DAMN time you got here!”

“C-captain?”

“Get me some tea and make it quick” Ukitake snarled.

“Yes sir” she squeaked and scurried off to make some. She had just finished making the tea when her co-3rd seat Sentaro Kotsubaki came in. “The Captain is acting very strange” she said.

“What do you mean?”

“Kotetsu!” She hurried out the door.

“Is that the Captain” he said in disbelief. He followed Kiyone out of the room.

“Kiyone gave her Captain his tea. He took a sip and spat it out. “What is this? This tea tastes horrible, can’t you do anything right?”

“Sorry Captain, sorry” she stammered.

“Get me another one and it better be right this time” he growled.

Kiyone scurried from the room in tears. Sentaro looked on wide-eyed. ‘What is wrong with the Captain? He never raises his voice, what has happened?’

“KOTSUBAKI!”

“I’m right here Captain.”

“Where are those reports I asked you to type?”

“Right here Captain. I did not get to type the last two yet.”

“Why in hell didn’t you? Why am I surrounded by incompetent people?” He threw the paperwork at the wall. “I’m going outside.” Ukitake stomped out the door to the courtyard. ‘I hate the look of these trees.’

Meanwhile inside, Kiyone returned to see Sentaro trying to pick up sheets of paper despite shaking violently.

“Where’s the Captain” she asked.

“Out-outside” stammered Sentaro.

“What happened here?”

“The Captain got angry at me because I did not finish my work and threw the paperwork at the wall. I’m trying to pick it up and then I have to finish the rest so he’ll be happy” he sniffed. “You better bring him his tea.”

“Oh right” she hurried outside but stopped in horror. “Captain what are you doing?”

Ukitake was hacking away at his beloved bonsai trees, totally destroying them. “Stupid trees” he muttered as he continued to hack away. 

Kiyone sprang to her Captain and stilled his arm. “Please Captain Stop it. You’ll make yourself sick.”

Ukitake wretched his arm free. “How dare you interfere with me” he roared shoving Kiyone to the ground. Sentaro came running outside. “The two of you are my SUBORDINATES NOT MY KEEPERS!” He started wheezing. “I give the orders around here not you.” He doubled over coughing his hand splattered with blood.

“CAPTAIN”, Kiyone cried. Sentaro bolted across the yard to help steady the captain. Kiyone spoke to Sentaro. “You get him to bed and I’ll go get my sister.”

“Aye, please hurry.”

Kiyone hurried off to the 4th division while Sentaro steered the still coughing (and complaining) captain to his quarters.


	7. Kuchiki

Chapter 7:Kuchiki

Disclaimer: Bleach is own by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making and money from this story.

Song used: ‘I’m so pretty’ (with slightly altered lyrics- girl to boy) is from West Side Story.  
This is the image that started this insanity of a story. I hope you enjoy.

Meanwhile at the 6th Division…

Lieutenants Renji Abarai of the 6th, Izuru Kira of the 3rd and Shuhei Hisagi of the 9th were standing outside the 6th Division barracks talking.

“Have you heard about the strange happening” asked Izuru.

“No”, said Renji.

“Apparently some of the captains are acting very odd.”

“I saw Rangiku running screaming through the streets” said Shuhei. “I think she was heading to the 4th.”

“Seriously” exclaimed Renji. “What could possibly make her freak out like that? Surely her captain could not be acting that strange to upset her that much?”

“I heard Omaeda, Nanao, Ikkaku and Yumichika were seen running there as well” said Izuru.

“I wonder if the soul candy some of the captains were testing could be the problem” asked Shuhei.

“I wouldn’t be surprised. I’d be scare to try anything that those guys from the 12th Division cooked up” said Renji.

“Didn’t you captain have to try the soul candy too?”

“Yah he did. I still don’t see how anything could cause a captain to acting that strangely. Everyone must be over-reacting. My captain would never act that weird no matter what.”

“Have you seen Captain Kuchiki today” asked Shuhei.

“No not yet which is very unusual? He is normally here before me.”

They stopped talking as they heard the sound of running and saw a group of shinigami run by. It was quiet for a moment then they could hear someone singing.

“I feel pretty, oh so pretty.  
I feel pretty, and witty and gay.”

They looked on in disbelief for coming down the street skipping and singing was Captain Kuchiki.

“---“

“---“

“---“

“And I pity any boy who isn’t me today.  
Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la!”  
Byakuya did a little twirl.

“Renji are you ok” asked Izuru as he noticed his friend’s rigid position.

“---“

“I feel charming, oh so charming.  
It’s alarming how charming I feel!”

“RENJI!”

Renji’s eyes rolled back into his head and he hit the ground with a thud.

“Damn it” Shuhei said as he knelt beside his friend.

“And so pretty that I hardy can believe I’m real.”  
Byakuya disappeared around the corner.

“Izuru give me a hand. IZURU!”

Izuru gave himself a shake. “Did we really see Captain Kuchiki skipping and singing?”

“Yes. Can you give me a hand with Renji please?”

“Oh sorry.” Izuru knelt beside Renji’s head.” That going to hurt when he wakes up” he pointed to the bleeding lump on the side of Renji’s head. “He must have hit the step when he went down. I’ll stop the bleeding but we should probably haul him to the 4th.” He quickly healed Renji’s open wound.

Renji’s eyes fluttered open. ”Did you…Captain…singing?’’

“Yes your captain was singing and twirling quite charmingly” laughed Shuhei.

Renji’s eyes roll back and he fainted again.

Izuru sighed. “Do you want feet or shoulder?”

“I’ll grab his feet; lift him on the count of three.”

“Ok”, Izuru grabbed Renji under the shoulders.

“One, two, three” they lifted Renji and started carrying him toward the 4th. “I’m almost glad I don’t have a captain at the moment.”

“Me too!” Izuru huffed. “Renji so owes us for carrying his heavy ass all the way to the 4th."

The two men slowly made their way to the 4th Division.


	8. 4th Division

Chapter 8: 4th Division

Disclaimer: Bleach is own by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making and money from this story.

The song ‘Barbie Girl’ is by the group Aqua from their album Aquarium

 

Meanwhile at the 4th Division…

The 4th Division was in chaos. Captain Retsu Unohana and her crew were quickly becoming overwhelmed. Between the Lieutenants and other seated officers all vying for her attention, and trying to coordinate the members of the 4th to administer aid to the other shinigami suffering from shock or injuries caused from fright, Captain Unohana was just about at her wits end.

“Captain we have another one” yelled 3rd seat Yasochika Lemura as he saw Renji being carried by Izuru and Shuhei. He ran out to give them a hand carrying Renji in to the relief station. Once they got Renji onto a bed the guys stretched and rubbed their aching backs.

“He is heavy” panted Shuhei.

“He owes a few rounds of sake for that” said Izuru.

Captain Unohana was meanwhile being hounded by Rangiku and Nanao.

“Please Captain you need to help my Captain” wailed Rangiku.

“What about my Captain, he needs help too” asked Nanao.

“Forget him he’s old, he’ll survive” said Rangiku.

“MY Captain needs help more. HER Captain is young he’ll bounce back just fine” stated Nanao as she glared at Rangiku.

“Please your Captain is doing his work for a change. My Captain is worse, he acting like a child.”

“Why you”, Nanao started to draw her zanpakuto.

“THAT”S ENOUGH YOU TWO! GO SIT DOWN, NOW!”

“Yes Captain.”

“Sorry Captain.”

Just then Kiyone Kotetsu came running in. “Isane please help” she yelled. Lieutenant Isane Kotetsu rushed over to her frantic sister. “Please help Captain Ukitake.”

“There are a lot of people needing help” said Captain Unohana.

“Please he was yelling and he started coughing up a lot of blood.”

“Go”, Captain said to her Lieutenant. Isane grabbed a relief pack and shunpo out the door, her sister right behind her. Just then Captain General Yamamoto came through the door his Lieutentant in tow.

“What is going on here” he asked.

“It seems the soul candy that the Captains were testing has some strange affects. All these people are here because of the actions taken by the Captains” said Captain Unohana.

“Explain” he said to the gathered shinigami.

“Captain Hitsugaya is acting very strange” said Rangiku timidly. “He was playing a video game and not doing his work. He was even chewing gum. I am so worried Captain Sir.”

“My Captain was in a frenzy”, stated Nanao. “As much as he doing his work is…admirable he is just so frantic.”

“What about you Omaeda? What do you have to say?” He looked toward the large man who was rocking slowly on a nearby bed. Marechiyo looked up, eyes wild with fright.

“S-she was NICE…going to buy a p-p-puppy…the Captain p-p-patted my BUTT” he wailed.

Yamamoto eyebrow rose. 

“Sir it was so ugly” cried Yumichika. “Captain Zaraki wanted to bake cookies,” many people gasped, “he was singing and dancing and wanted to play with the children, it was horrible, so ugly.”

“Madarame, do you have something to add?”

“---“

He is still in shock sir” said Captain Unohana.

“What about him” Yamamoto pointed to the still unconscious Renji. Izuru and Shuhei looked at each other begging the other to tell the Captain General what happened. Shuhei sighed and faced Yamamoto.

“Captain Kuchiki was acting very odd. “He was singing and skipping, the shock caused Renji to faint and he hit his head pretty hard.”

Captain Unohana rushed over to check Renji. Izuru quietly told her of the treatment already given.

“While this behavior is shocking you are all shinigami of the Gotei 13” Captain General said. “You should not let something like this effect you.” The sound of a commotion could be heard outside. Captain Yamamoto and Captain Unohana stepped outside followed by most of the shinigami. The sound of singing could be faintly heard, quickly getting louder.

*“I’m a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world.  
Life in plastic, it’s fantastic!  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere,  
Imagination, life is your creation.”

“Come on Barbie let’s go party!”

“I’m a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world.  
Life in plastic, it’s fantastic!  
You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere,  
Imagination, life is your creation.”

Eyes widen and gasps could be heard. Coming down the street skipping, swinging a giggling Yachiru between them were Captains Zaraki and Kuchiki.

“I’m a blonde bimbo girl in the fantasy world.  
Dress me up; make it tight, I’m your dolly”

“You’re my doll, rock and roll.  
Feel the glamour in pink.  
Kiss me here; touch me there, hanky panky.”

“You can touch.  
You can play.  
If you say, I’m always yours  
uu-oooh-u

I’m a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world.  
Life in plastic, it’s fantastic!”

“Captain Yamamoto?”

“---“

“You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere.  
Imagination, life is your creation.”

“Captain Unohana?”

“---“

“Come on Barbie let’s go party!”

“Ah-ah-ah-yeah”

“Come on Barbie let’s go party!”

“Uu-oooh-u.”

“Come on Barbie let’s go party!”

“Ah-ah-ah-yeah.”

“Come on Barbie let’s go party!”

“Uu-oooh-u.”

“CAPTAIN YAMAMOTO SIR!”

“Make me walk, make me talk.  
Do whatever you please.  
I can act like a star, I can beg on my knees.”

“Come jump in, bimbo friend,  
Let’s do it again.  
Hit the town, fool around  
Let’s go party.”

“You can touch,   
You can play.  
If you say I’m always yours  
……..”

The trio disappeared around a corner, the sound of their voices fainting away.

Captain Yamamoto stared at the corner, then slowly turned to his Lieutenant, Chojiro Sasakibe. “Sasakibe get Kurotsuchi here NOW!!!”

“Yes sir”, he shunpo towards the 12th Division.

 

* Picture Byakuya singing the Barbie (girl) part and Kenpachi singing the Ken (boy) part…shudders!!


	9. Kurotsuchi

Chapter9: Kurotsuchi

Disclaimer: Bleach is own by Tite Kubo and Shonen Jump. I am not making and money from this story.

A short time later Captain Kurotsuchi entered the 4th Division relief center with his Lieutenant Nemu Kurotsuchi and Lieutenant Sasakibe in tow.

“You sent for me. I am rather busy.”

“Would you like to explain why all the captains that tested your soul candy are acting so strangely” demanded Captain Yamamoto.

“Well, it seems that the captains were accidentally given the wrong soul candy to try” Captain Kurotsuchi replied. “They must of taken the other new soul candy we developed instead.”

“What do you mean the other soul candy” asked Captain Unohana.

“This one is rather fascinating. It causes a person’s personality to become the opposite of what it normally is.”

“Why would you develop something like that” asked Captain Yamamoto.”

“Think of the possibilities. It could be giving to prisoners to make them no longer violent, it could help with depression among other things. This mistake really has had very positive results.”

“You still need to reverse this” demanded Yamamoto, “there has been too much disruption to the Seireitei.”

“I am afraid there is no way to reverse the effect other than to let it wear off on its own.”

“How long will that take” asked Unohana.

“Not long a day or two, a week at the most.”

“WHAT” screamed the gathered crowd!

“How could you develop something like this and not create an antidote,” said Captain Yamamoto in frustration. “What do you plan to do about this?”

“Continue to collect data, really what harm are they doing?”

“Captain Ukitake is seriously ill from his reaction to your soul candy” stated Captain Unohana.

“Captain Ukitake is always seriously ill” said Captain Kurotsuchi dismissively. “You can medicate him for a few days if necessary. If that is all, I really should get back to observing the other Captains.”

“You mean you’re just going to leave them like that”, yelled Rangiku. “The Captain is going to be very upset when he is back to himself.”

“He’ll get over it,” Kurotsuchi sneered. May I be excused” he asked Captain Yamamoto.

“Fine but I suggest you try to develop an antidote.”

“As you wish” said Kurotsuchi. Come Nemu.” He swept from the room Nemu following behind him.

Captain Yamamoto addressed the crowd. “You are all members of the Gotei 13 and as such I expect you to handle things in your Division in your Captain place. I know their behavior may be odd and difficult to deal with but you will deal with it! You are all professionals and have been trained to deal with difficult situations, help your Captain in any way possible and keep your units calm by being calm yourselves. Now go back to your Divisions, meet with your units and go back to your duties. We can not allow the Seireitei to fall into chaos.”

“Aye, Captain.”

“Yes sir.”

The gathered shinigami left, going back to their Division determined to do their duty even if it meant putting up with their Captain’s strange behavior for a few days.

Captain Yamamoto sighed.

“You might want to arrange to send Kurotsuchi away for a little while, I’m sure his Division can continue to work on an antidote just in case this takes time to wear off” said Captain Unohana. “I don’t think some of the Captains will be very happy when they come back to themselves.”

“He deserves to deal with his own mess.”

“Yes but with three Captains already needing to be replaced,” she said.

“We shouldn’t press our luck” he sighed. “I guess I can send him to Hueco Mundo.”

“You could, but I’ve heard Siberia is lovely this time of year” smirked Unohana.

Captain Yamamoto laughed. “Siberia it is. I will send word to him. A few months should give him lots to observe.” He walked out shaking his head. He would enjoy personally opening that Senkaimon.

A Few days Later….

The quiet of the Seireitei was interrupted by the cry of several voices.

“KUROTSUCHI!!!”

 

Well that the end. Hope you enjoyed the story.


End file.
